As an adolescent surrounded by social media and celebrity endorsement in the 21st century, I certainly know everything about what is beautiful. This is the most cliché topic of life, but I am SO tired of seeing others feeling insecure and less valuable for their external appearance. It frustrates me so much.
I’ve realized everyone has their own opinion of what or who is beautiful. Why? It’s because what we believe is beautiful is what we’re taught.
Have you noticed how trends evolve? If you take a look at a couple of Cut Videos you’ll understand that “beauty” is constantly changing.
A few weeks ago I came across Cassey Ho’s post about this topic and it made me realize that what is considered beautiful now, may not be in a few years.
If you also look at what different cultures perceive as beautiful, you’d get a series of different answers. An example being the ideal female body types in different countries shown here, as well as ideal male standards here.
So what is beautiful right now in modern Western culture? For females? Nice eyebrows, full lips, small waist, and big booty.
For males? A masculine, “manly” appearance, a defined jawline, and chiseled six pack abs.
It also comes down to what you think is beautiful, what you’re surrounded by, and what you’re taught. For me, my style has changed drastically during phases of my life.
In elementary school, all I watched was The Powerpuff Girls and ate pizza pockets all day whilst asking mom “why do people go on diets? I think I’m so pretty and I love chips nom nom nom”.
In 5th grade I found a bunch of scene kids on Facebook and Tumblr and thought that was extremely cool, so I would dress and do my hair just like them.
In middle school I was still on Tumblr all the time and started looking at Korean models, got interested in Korean pop music, got rid of my side fringe and changed them to blunt bangs. I started loathing my olive skin and thicker thighs because I wanted to be snow white pale and skinny like them.
So this is how to be beautiful:
You’re actually beautiful to someone (you can punch me for giving you the most cringey and cliché answer of life), BUT TRUST ME. LIKE I’M NOT KIDDING.
Someone does think you’re beautiful, just go outside and ask. People aren’t just being nice when they compliment you.
But maybe me or other people telling you you’re beautiful doesn’t work.
The only way you can perceive yourself as beautiful is if you FEEL beautiful.
What do I mean by this?
You know when you have fat days? Days when you “feel fat”?
Let’s say you wake up and look in the mirror and all you see are “flaws”. You loathe yourself, you hate yourself, you feel ugly. You could be the most attractive person in the world but you could still feel ugly.
How do we fix this? Do things that make you feel beautiful.
It could be ANYTHING. If putting on a little bit of eyeliner makes you feel beautiful, do it! If it doesn’t, then don’t! Maybe just adding a little bit of lip balm makes you feel beautiful, or maybe having a full face of makeup does. Maybe it’s dressing a certain way, maybe working out makes you feel confident in your body, and maybe surrounding yourself with nature makes you feel beautiful. Whatever it is, do little things that makes you feel like yourself and that adds character to you, but make sure you’re doing it for yourself and not anybody else (hah that rhymed).
Take care of yourself, stop comparing yourself, and do little things that make you feel beautiful.